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Frances is here to help us see things as they really are instead of how we want to see them.Below, she takes us through a relationship reality check to keep your head clear at every stage of the relationship: Frances' first-date trick (known as her "Heartache Prevention Question") is simply to ask him, point blank, if he believes in X (X being your ultimate dream and goal, be it monogamy, marriage, having a family, or running away to join the circus).With a girl I'm interested in on a deeper, relationship level, I always try to have a real conversation with her and try to get to know her a lot more than if I just want to hook up with her.Source: Shutter Stock Lithelm Raspberry: If I'm just trying to hook up then I'll try to initiate sex upon first meeting you.When you start talking every day, you’ve definitely got a potential relationship on your hands. A guy isn’t going to waste his time learning what your interests are if he just thinks of you as an occasional hookup.If he’s interested in dating you, he’s going to ask you questions, such as what you love to do in your spare time, what foods you like and don’t like, what your favorite music is, and even what you do for a living.If you're just looking for sex, then carry on, but if not, how can you tell if a guy is really right for the long-term?
Source: Shutter Stock p00pp00pp00p: Personally at the start of knowing each other there's no difference.
Sometimes you just need an outsider’s perspective, especially if that outsider is a dude. I found a thread on Ask Reddit that addresses this exact issue: how can you tell if a guy is just looking for sex or for something more? 10 guys explain how to tell if he just wants to hook up and doesn’t want to date you: Homeless Pandas: The two aren't mutually exclusive, and every situation differs somewhat.
Real guys answered, and it was super interesting to hear what they had to say. But as a general rule with girls I purely want to hook up with, I just flirt hard, subtle hip touches, lots of eye contact, I will stand really close to her etc.
It's not always easy to tell the difference between a guy who's seriously into you and one who's wrapped up in the moment. Lust is a powerful thing, and some men will do just about anything in the sweet spot between "nice to meet you" and "sex." Closing the gap between point A and B can be a goal some men pursue with the same vigor as Roger Federer practicing for, playing in, and attempting to win Wimbledon, for example.
They may get carried away and act like you're the be-all and end-all, only to lose interest or show their true colors as soon as you sleep together.